Paris Hilton was observed using the bike lane on Santa Monica Boulevard yesterday and the paparazzi were there to capture the action. There was just one problem: She wasn’t riding a bike.
Drat. Apparently Paris sees bike lanes as a cool alternative to driving her SUV in the actual lanes of car traffic because, you know, other drivers are so slow, and SUVs are so dang big.
Now we know via Cyclelicio.us that Paris Hilton actually has a bike and presumably knows how to ride it. So there’s an opportunity here.
Our fantasy for this aging Hollywood starlet would be for the judge to sentence her to riding Santa Monica on a bike for a day, paparazzi in tow, sort of like that “Curb Your Enthusiasm” episode where Larry David had to wear a sign around his neck after stealing a fork from a restaurant.
Now there would be some publicity Paris could contribute to the greater good of society, and the bike culture as well.
But for Paris to behave in any sort of non-court mandated altruistic way would mean that she’d have to recognize that the universe does not revolve around her and that might just shatter her psyche into a million pieces.
But hey, at least she got a ticket for it. I think tickets should be scaled according to income, she’s rich as all get out so why not make the ticket 100 times as expensive? Although that is probably not really feasible!
Also, I love how you refer to her as an aging starlet! Hahaha!
We have been watching Paris Hilton’s BFF. Where do they come across these people? They are from another world!